Lee Sumner
Certified Professional Coach

for inspiration, strategies, and results

JULY 2005

Vol. II - Issue 7

SAVE THESE DATES! August 26-28, 2005 FALLING AWAKE: Creating the Life of Your Dreams A weekend intensive with Lee Sumner Emmett O’Neal Library Birmingham, Alabama Earlybird discount till August 5 Call (205) 870-1877 to register today or email: lee@nolimitscoach.com with "Falling Awake" in the subject line.

Lee’s Dream Team Freshly updated -- my private yellow pages of 82 recommended pros. Grab your copy here! (PDF)

Just for Fun If you've mastered the "pat-your-head-and-rub-your- tummy" challenge, then you may be ready for this one. Sitting or standing, raise your foot off the ground and rotate it CLOCKWISE. Use your right leg if you're right-handed, the left foot if you're left-handed. Now write the numeral "6" without changing the direction of your rotating foot. If you can pull this one off, you're in the vast minority!

Top Ten Strategies for Living in the Slow Lane

1. Give yourself periods of "no phone calls" time. The telephone is one of the most regularly stressful distractions of life. Set aside a certain time of the day when you turn off the ringer or don’t take calls at all except real emergencies. Return calls at a time when you can answer specific questions via voice mail versus a 10-15 minute conversation.

2. Eliminate the "rat race" mentality. One of the problems of thinking about and discussing your job/life as being stuck in the rat race is that it sets you up to be frightened, impatient and annoyed. Decide to re-frame your situation.
Example: Instead of saying, "I spent my day in boring meetings listening to arguments and dealing with constant conflict," try "The art of my work is bringing people together who, on the surface, don't seem to get along very well. It's a good thing I'm there to help." Can you feel the difference?

3. Speak softly. When you speak too quickly and with a loud voice, the energy you send out into the world is frantic and nervous. People around you will feel pressured and slightly agitated. Speak more softly and you may discover that you begin to feel calmer and less stressed. Next, you'll discover that everyone around you will quickly start to quiet down, too.

4. Give yourself an extra 10 minutes. Instead of always rushing, start out 10 minutes early instead of waiting until the last possible moment. You will find yourself with plenty of time to spare and less stressed out in the process.

5. Create a bridge between your spirituality and your work. This means taking the essence of who you are and what you believe into your work space. If kindness, patience, honesty and generosity are spiritual qualities that you believe in, make every effort to practice them at work.

Example: If it's your job to reprimand someone, do so from a place of love and respect. Creating this spiritual bridge will remind you of a higher purpose and put your problems and concerns into a broader context.

6. Practice saying "no" without guilt. The problem with always saying "yes" is twofold. It makes you feel overwhelmed, stressed and tired. And you end up doing things you don't want to or shouldn't be doing -- all the while acting, on the surface, as if everything is just fine.

Helpful: When the request is made, ask yourself, "All things considered, is it in my best interest to say yes?" Put in this perspective, there are probably many instances when it's perfectly okay to say no.

7. Don't dramatize deadlines. A lot of deadline stress comes not from the deadlines themselves, but from the energy wasted thinking about them, wondering whether we'll meet them, feeling sorry for ourselves and, perhaps most of all, commiserating with others about them. Working toward your goal without the static of negative mental energy makes any job more manageable.

8. Write a list of personal priorities. Put the list away. After a week or two, take out the list and reread it. Ask yourself how you have spent your time and whether your actions were consistent with your list. If so, congratulations! If not, begin taking steps to line up your behavior with your priorities.

9. Create a "selfish" ritual. When you have what you need in an emotional sense, you have plenty left over for others. Rituals can be as simple as a 15-minute daily walk, browsing bookstores or having a quiet cup of coffee as you read an inspiring thought before work. The point is, it's your time -- a special part of the day reserved just for you.

10. Take breaks. While you may not feel it at the time, failure to take regular breaks makes you become less patient and less attentive. Breaks don't have to be disruptive or last very long. Usually all we need is a few minutes every hour or so to clear our heads, stretch a bit and get some air. It's like pressing the reset button and providing ourselves with a fresh start.

Based on writings of Richard Carlson, PhD, author of best-seller Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...and it's all small stuff (Hyperion).

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Lightening your physical load by having a garage sale, giving away your old clothes or moving to a smaller house won't automatically give you peace of mind. To be calm, at least some of the time, you need to break free of the mind-cluttering habits, worries and distractions that tie you in knots. Try experimenting with some of these practical steps you can take now.

Enjoy!

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Lee Sumner is a Certified Professional Coach based in Birmingham, Alabama, who has helped hundreds of people create high-quality lives. She is President of No Limits Coaching and is a popular speaker, columnist and facilitator. (205.870.1877)