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for inspiration, strategies, and results |
July 2006 |
Vol. III - Issue 7 |
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Words of Wisdom“What we think about and thank about...comes about.” ~ Esther Hicks 
Call Lee today!
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 When I asked you last month to send in the top five adjectives that popped to mind when you thought of me and No Limits Coaching, I had no idea how much fun this would be! (Folks who emailed received a surprise a bit later.) For a real boost, try this one yourself. I appreciate your generous responses. Warmly,
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Top 10 Ways to Stop Being
Unattractive to Yourself
STOP doing what you know is bad for you.
Start nourishing yourself.
Excellent self-care will help you be attractive—to yourself and to everyone you meet. There are probably things you once did, and were okay about, that have since become wrong for you. As you progress on the upward pathway you've begun, you’ll naturally notice a stronger wish to let go of unhealthy habits of all kinds. You'll be less willing to put up with any non-nourishing things or people that were part of your routine before.
STOP trying to meet anyone else's expectations.
Start meeting your own.
It's a good thing to be responsive to other people, but the fun stops when you cross the line and begin responding to their expectations of you. Be patient with yourself here. And, while you're at it, start unhooking other people from your expectations of them.
STOP being good.
Start breaking rules.
Being a "nice" person all the time -- that's a lot of pressure. Women in particular get lots of messages designed to ensure that they’ll be forever nice (compliant). Lighten up and let go of doing something you’re feeling pressured to do. Follow your personal instincts to open a pathway to a new way of seeing yourself.
STOP comparing yourself to others.
Start identifying your own measures.
Spend some time and some thought on coming up with your own measures of who you are and how you're doing. Those are the measuring sticks of lasting importance in your life.
STOP setting yourself up.
Start making life easy on you.
Ask yourself, "Where can I see that I've set myself up for stress or failure?" Look at the reason that motivated you in the first place to set yourself up. Now, get to know that part of you really well. Don't wrestle with it or attack the problems it causes. Simply acknowledge and be aware of that part of you. To become really attractive, you'll need to make peace with it.
STOP setting other people up.
Start under-promising.
When you release yourself from the pattern of over-promising, you gain more freedom and create a huge reserve of unburdened time. Break the cycle of making other people dependent on you. Start saying no whenever you can. When people ask how long something will take, silently make an estimate and then double it. It's much easier and more fulfilling to deliver something you’ve never promised.
STOP waiting.
Start trusting your inklings.
Become more attuned to your feelings and intuitions. Sometimes you make yourself feel great -- really attractive -- by doing something everyone else thinks is crazy.
STOP chasing.
Start appreciating.
Let up on chasing your dreams for a moment. Take a look at any goals, people, "coulds" you're currently chasing. How might you benefit if you let them go? What else might that energy and dedication bring you? It's better to spend your energies attaining all of a nearby goal than absolutely none of a distant goal, right? And besides, following the path of least resistance just might be bringing that distant goal nearer to you -- with less effort.
STOP having problems.
Start solving them.
You can become either an expert problem solver or a problem-free zone. The latter is less rewarding and dramatic, but is far more attractive and extremely energy-efficient. Be a problem-solving specialist -- and a long line of them will show up at your door. So value yourself for the skills you most want to employ, and use your creativity to respond to the problem without fixing it.
STOP trying to become somebody.
Just be yourself.
One of the ways we strive is trying to project ourselves as somebody more than, or other than, we really are. Give up trying to become somebody else, and you'll truly begin growing up. You'll begin to discover more fully just who you are. It's for sure that you're going to end up delighted and positively amazed.
Adapted from Thomas J. Leonard, founder of the International Coach Federation.
Lee Sumner is a Certified Professional Coach who has successfully assisted hundreds of people in creating high-quality lives. She is President of No Limits Coaching and is a member of the International Coach Federation.
You are receiving this e-mail because you signed up for this service, are a valued client or former client, a colleague, or someone I met who expressed interest. I NEVER sell or give a subscriber's name or e-mail address to anyone. If you received this mail in error I apologize. Please unsubscribe to be deleted from future mailings, and feel free to re-join at any time. DUPLICATION of this FREE newsletter is encouraged. You may copy, forward, or republish it only in its entirety and with all attributions intact. Copyright 2006 Lee Sumner, all rights reserved.